His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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