Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
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