he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize
