That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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