i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
It's rum buckets o'clock
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
