It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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