then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize