i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
