sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize
