im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
