actually, I'm a sock model
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
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