One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
You took a bar mat shot.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize