It's Friday. Sex?
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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