im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize