I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Come see our sink grown plant.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
