Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
