Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
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