i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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