Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
