I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize