Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
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