Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
