On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
two words...techno handjob
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Randomize
