i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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