I'd wear matching sweaters with you
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
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