we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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