oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
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