I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
