I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Randomize
