Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
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