i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Randomize
