Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
