I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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