"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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