We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
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