first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
