Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
