Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
