dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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