There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize