omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Operation Purity has been aborted
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
