I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
