Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I want to fling myself into the sun
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
