Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
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