So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I want her autograph on my taint
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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