So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
