What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
