I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Randomize
