you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Randomize
