So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
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