That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
