GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
How does one acquire holy water?
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
